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Category: Triple F’s Blogs

Blog entries for 40 Fro~ed and Fabulous

Watch Yourself…

What I’ve discovered is there is a way to fly into forty without looking back. I can (in the words of one of my sisters at church-Madelyn) “Bust forty wide open.” It’s not fair, nevertheless, for me to do that in the face of making other people around me feel uncomfortable or disrespected. To the contrary, this journey through my forties should somehow be an example of what younger women should strive toward in their own journey. Yes I can be authentic. Yes I can be direct. Yes I can express my opinions. Yes I can disagree. Yes I can offer criticisms. Yes I can walk and talk in the entire fullness of who I am on any given Sunday. I have no right, however, to be disrespectful, inappropriate, crass, judgmental and out of order just be cause I have a few years under my belt. So what? In the grand scheme of things who really cares that I’m 40, 50, 60 years old if I’m acting a fool? Foolishness on a 40 year old doesn’t wear too well. Rather than the expression of “she carries her age well,” people will be running around whispering “Now, she’s too old for that mess,” under their breaths.

So I have to make a choice. I’m proud to be blessed with 40 years, but how am I to present that to the world? What’s my responsibility to the people around me, the people who are watching me every single day? What example am I setting even without knowing it? That’s what forty leaves me thinking about as I “do me” all day every day.

My dream of flinging words all over the place without the least bit of responsibility is still a dream. I just have to play out in my head giving a colleague a piece of mind or rolling my eyes slow at my students, or snapping the head off of a woman down the pew who gave me the “stank eye.” Yes, it is all a dream. And sometimes, maybe sometimes–in a moment of pure unadulterated weakness–I may break down and make a few of those dreams a reality. In the meantime, I urge you in your trip toward growing more and more fabulous every single day, to “Watch Yourself!” You never know who else is watching you.

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Who You Callin’ a B****?!

Please don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying that maturity in this arena gives me license to run around acting a fool. I understand, rather, that what people feel, think, voice about me may have very little to do with me. There are so many other factors involved. There is always a context, something surrounding and grounding a person’s thoughts. There is always mood and experience: that is whoever is formulating these opinions may have had a very bad day and an even worse night. Factors like this shape responses and being cognizant of that helps me to shake a lot of stuff off without even an eyebrow raise.

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