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Holding your Pee(ace)


I had another post scheduled for today, but the spirit of “How to Swallow… Your Words” is still with me and I found myself thinking about serial posts on the subject.

Warning:  TMI.

controlmouthI was talking with my good friend and blolleague Kathy (Sound Clarity) last night, and somehow we got around to comparing how we use words to a leaky bladder.  (I know, UGH, right?).  There was a time that I could not use a public bathroom AT ALL.  I would hold it and hold it and hold it until I got to a “safe” place to pee.  The closer I got to forty, and the more babies I had, I found that peeing in public bathrooms was just not that big of a deal.  If you gotta go, you gotta go. The consensus is this: the older one gets, the harder it is to control one’s bladder.

It has become embarrassingly obvious that my mouth is going through a similar process.  Just 10 years ago, I gave deep thought and evaluation to what I said to people, how I presented myself through words, the message I gave in communicating my feelings.  I waited until I felt “safe” before I said what I had to say.  Now, I have found that stuff just leaks out!  Did I say that?  Like that? Yes.  Yes, I did. Out of my mouth, on paper, it just comes out.

It’s not always bad.  Age, opportunity and experience have culled a lot extra fluff from my conversations.  I get right to the point.  I don’t always try to fit my dialog to please or appease people, not because I don’t want to, but because often I don’t have time.

Likewise, time has trained my tongue, so I don’t have to work as hard to be appropriate; however, sometimes, I dont wait to get to a “safe” place before the steady stream of words flow.  I can’t pull the words back in, or change the direction of the stream.

Herein lies the reason why I need to commune with God constantly, all day, everyday, so that my words may be tempered by God’s presence.  Only God can control the stream of words that may fly out of my forty-plus, I ain’t got time to be playing around with you, mouth. I’m not quite sure what will come out at times.  Michel Montaigne put it best in his essay, “The Inconsistency of Man’s Actions.”  He argues that we can try to predict what people will do or say based on the past, but man contradicts himself so much, it seems as if there are two different people in one body. Therefore we may predict potential, but we cant predict the future. I have to lend over my language to the one who does.

So as you navigate your day, lovelies, remember sometimes age brings about the unconcerned fruit of an uncontrolled tongue.  Wake up to a conversation with God so that your  responses and reactions will promote Peace.


Published inChristian Communication 101Triple F's Blogs


  1. Cicely Cicely

    Hold it! God has been presenting me with opportunities one after another to exercise my new skill of holding my peace and swallowing my words. I guess I’m in a remedial “close your mouth” class because He’s teaching me everyday. Thanks for this!

  2. Kathryn Kathryn

    Well said lady! Now if I could only keep my mouth close after I hear God say ….”hold your tongue on this one.” Ugh!!!!!

  3. I love this reminder, Di – especially about waking up with God. I find myself thirsty for His wisdom & insight. I spend my mornings with Him, that sometimes (ok most times) I’m running late for work. I also listen to sermons/podcasts in the car on the way to work & when I get to work. If we fill our souls, minds, & body with Godliness, we won’t have time or room to fill it with anything else that is not of God. Therefore what we are filled with will spill over to others (my cup runneth over). The question is what’s in your cup? Is it Godliness or something else?

  4. Carmen Carmen

    As my pastor has said…there are 3 people with you always and at that time, I don’t think he was referring to ‘the Father, the Son, and the Holy Ghost,. He actually stated those 3 people are who you use to be, who you are now, and who you’re trying to be” followed with “and anyone of them can show up at anytime”. So others must beware because often we are anxious to let that ‘old man’ show his head. Just as I remember stating, “I can’t wait til I turn 40, so I can say what I want to say and not care what anyone thinks about”. As women, we often wear those loose lips like a badge, “I’ll tell folks off, she gone make me read her, they don’t want to hear what I got to say”… Yeah we sing all those tunes. Thanks for reminding us that we do not have the permission!

  5. Cicely Cicely

    Carmen, you said it! This heah has helped me!

  6. Rhonda Maydwell Rhonda Maydwell

    Well said! I think that maturity in our walk with God and in life in general helps us to monitor our drippy mouths (ewwwwww….). Sometimes a thing needs to be said right away and without mincing words, while other times we need time, prayer, and leading from God before we speak. I agree with you that constant communication with the Father allows us to know the difference and to speak confidently.

  7. Kelly Kelly

    Yepsir = the truth has been told! We certainly have to pick and choose what we say, how we say it and most importantly, the appropriate time to say it. That in itself takes a LOT of prayer and power! Now if we can just get those we are speaking to accept the truth of what is being said………I know – but IJS!

  8. Jackie Peterson Jackie Peterson

    As I was reading the posts from the ladies I know, I must admit, you all are growing. To enlists the wisdom and understanding of our Lord and Savior, is vital to growth. Learning to watch those words takes practice, as well as patience. I’m very proud of you Ladye Di, for continuing to renew our abilities in promoting positiveness, peacefulness, and praise to our God. Remember, Proverbs 3:5,6.

    Jackie Peterson

  9. Demetria Bowers-Adair Demetria Bowers-Adair

    My granny had many “powerhouse” of a woman tools. She was loving, nurturing, generously giving, a master in hospitality, and a cook par excellent! Being the powerhouse of a woman she was she had one secret (or not so secret) tool she used most often when she needed to tell it like it T-I-IS (in her words). She could cut you with that tongue and you would need emergency surgery and not EVEN know it. She did it with such grace, such tact, such, such, such “nice nastiness”. I have always worn my inherent tools of all the strong women in my family with honor and pride, especially that latter one. Yeah, I could feel myself reaching for that one every chance I had. Around about age 40 as I matured more in age and my walk with Christ I literally start saying to myself when I thought it was time to whip out that tongue tool I was so proud of “EASY MOMMA ANNIE EASY!” God has stilled my tongue, my hand, and my actions so many times for the sake of circumstantial peace and His peace in my life. Yeah I’m still Annie ‘ child and that tongue gets anxious but the benefits of holding that tongue gives so much peace than the temporary satisfaction of telling it like it T-I-IS! Lol

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