The problem I have had with verbal communication (especially during conflict) is trying to maintain power. I fear if I hesitate too long to speak, I will be seen as weak and will be pushed over and taken advantage of. This fear prompts me to speak quickly and sharply with deadly aim. In no way am I saying one should be defenseless against verbal disrespect or abuse. What am I saying is if we give more thought to what and how we say things, we will do more good than harm.